The Stealth Networker Blog

There's Treasure in Your Past Connections

Okay, so it's been over a month since my last post, but my book manuscript is finally in my editor’s very capable hands. Her reaction has been positive so far which hopefully means not much re-writing on my part, although I've thought of a couple things I want to add anyway. My brain just won't turn off after writing for 8-10 hours a day for 4+ weeks. Pam Slim of Escape from Cubicle Nation says that’s just the next book wanting to come out! (She submitted a great story for my book, by the way, which I needed to cut down to 250 words, but just couldn’t bring myself to do it.)

As research for my book I've been more active on LinkedIn and Facebook, doubling my connections and friends (if we're not connected yet, look me up), and I even joined Twitter (more about that in a future post). I must say it's been very enlightening.

LinkedIn has been great for getting back in touch with old colleagues. In fact, someone I worked with 20 years ago in the college bookstore at U.C. Berkeley tracked me down (I don't use my maiden name for anything, so I don't even know how he found me), but he's a professor at Georgetown now and will be a great contact for a future goal I'm considering.

I also reconnected with a co-worker at Time Inc., who now has a big new job and recently interviewed a woman who used to work for me, which coincidentally I found out about the other night when this woman and I had dinner. I emailed a strong recommendation through LinkedIn to my former Time Inc. colleague and we'll see what happens.

Last summer I wrote about dipping my toe into LinkedIn a bit more and I'm glad I did. I don't find it as fun as Facebook, or as strangely addictive as Twitter, but that's probably just as well. As with any networking tool--whether it's joining a group, going to events, or participating in social media--the more you invest, the bigger the payoffs are.

The trick is using the right tools in the right combination and in the right amounts. I address this in the book, which I thought would be a brief last chapter with a few words on how to put everything together, but turned out to be pretty comprehensive. Simple, yet comprehensive. One of my key strengths. Hope my editor likes it.

Shifting Gears for Holiday Networking

In the NY Post career column this week, Go To Greg gives some great tips for office party mixing and mingling. Aside from being on your best behavior and enjoying the festivities in moderation, Greg gives another sage piece of advice:

“While the office party is a place where you can cripple your career, it’s not the time or place to advance it. Cozying up to the boss and trying to engage into much serious ‘shop talk’ or impress with some new idea is transparent, and will cause your boss’ eyes to dart around the room looking for an excuse to escape.”

Networking successfully is about being flexible with your approach and adapting your activities to the situation. When you’re in a social situation, it’s best to focus on strengthening your relationships through casual conversation. While some work issues may come up, no one really wants to talk serious business, so keep it relaxed. Take the opportunity to connect with folks in different ways.

For example, earlier this week one of my clients held his annual holiday dinner. I sat next to one of the sales managers whom I rarely get a chance to see because he lives in Maryland. Although he’s worked for the company for more than three years, it wasn’t until that night that I learned that he has a passion for sailing. Knowing just a little bit more about people brings you closer to them.

Is Networking Like a Box of Chocolates?

While traipsing around Manhattan in 90 degree weather this week, I found myself cursing (more than once) about having to leave my perfectly cool office to meet a new networking contact for a one-on-one follow up meeting.  These meetings typically proceed a brief face-to-face meeting or a phone call, during which one or both of us feels that there are enough synergies between our businesses to merit a more detailed conversation.

Two of the meetings turned out to be very promising, with both new contacts having a strong understanding of the type of business consulting I do, which is one of the main challenges I sometimes have with networking.  A third meeting was a lunch with an old networking pal which gave us a great opportunity to get caught up.  And the fourth was a total bust, with the person standing me up completely. 

I don’t confirm appointments and frankly, don’t like when people call me to confirm.  If I say I will meet you somewhere at a certain time, I will put it in my calendar and I will be there.  That’s integrity, doing what you say you will do, and I use that as a test of whether someone belongs in my network at all.

No matter how full my schedule, I always like to leave time each month for one-on-one meetings to explore new connections and build on others.  Most of them turn out fine, a few turn out great, and some just don’t turn out at all.  You just never know what you’ll get. 

© 2005, Liz Lynch
Liz Lynch is founder and executive director of the Center for Networking Excellence which develops products and programs to help professionals learn how to build profitable relationships. If you're ready to start networking smarter, get your free networking tips now at www.NetworkingExcellence.com .